Here are a three reasons why our prayers are sometimes not answered the way we want.

1. We pray for things that actually won’t help us. I wonder if anyone here prays to win the lottery! Maybe we should instead pray to save our money better, be harder-working, or less materialistic. It’s interesting that we pray for material success, but not spiritual success.
2. We pray for things without cooperating with God (we talked about this two weeks ago). For example, we pray, “Lord, help me lose weight,” while eating whatever we want. “Lord, help me pass the test…” that we didn’t study for. “Give me a good parking spot,” when it was our fault for leaving late. I make these mistakes too.
3. Another mistake in prayer is to give up praying for something important. Dr. Tim Gray once said that he used to pray that his father would stop smoking. When he was a kid, he’d pray for this. When he was a young man, he’d pray for this. But nothing happened, nothing changed, so he gave up. It was only after his father quit smoking that he realized his mistake: that he had given up prayer and lacked faith.
   

   Dr. Timothy Gray, Scripture Scholar

I’m sad to say I’ve also given up on certain prayers. I’ve also prayed for things without really believing that God would answer these prayers. I’ve prayed without faith and that’s what we’re focusing on today.

The Canaanite woman gives us this great example of faith! She persists even though Jesus is silent towards her. She doesn’t give up because her faith is so strong. And Jesus is amazed: “Woman, great is your faith!”

Jesus emphasizes the importance of faith when He says, “Whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours” (Mk 11:24). Matthew 13:58 says, “And [Jesus] did not do many mighty works there,” why? “Because of their unbelief.” Why do we have to believe we’ll receive it when we pray for something?

It’s because faith means trust. What’s the point in asking for something without trust (meaning we think God won’t do it for us or can’t do it for us)? Praying for something without faith/trust means we doubt God’s love for us.

Faith also means obedience. What’s the point of asking without obedience (meaning we ask for something but don’t love Him or follow Him in what He asks us to do)? Are we just to say words without meaning them? Why then ask?

Finally, praying with faith means praying sincerely: “Jesus, You can do what I ask if it’s your will. I love You, I’m not just using You. I believe You’re good and know what You’re doing and I trust You.”

Even when we pray with trust, obedience and sincerity, sometimes God still asks us to wait because it’s not the right time, because He has a better plan, or because people resist Him (free will can still block God’s love from penetrating our hearts). Other times He asks us to wait so that we actually become more trusting, more obedient and more sincere when we pray so that we don’t just use Him.

I find these truths so inspiring! I do believe and I have great faith in Jesus. I’ve seen miracles in my life, answers to prayers. For example, I wasn’t raised Catholic and yet I’m a priest. My brother’s also a priest. Since ordination, many times couples have asked me to pray that God give them a child, and God answers our prayers. I’ve seen so many couples blessed with children that I’ve thought about going into the infertility business! (At least I’d be a lot cheaper than some doctors.)

Over dinner, I once asked a young married man how he met his wife. He said that he had prayed that God would send him a beautiful caucasian or oriental woman. I responded with surprise and with a smile on my face, “You prayed for that!?” He said, “Yeah, I find them attractive.” “So be it,” I thought. At least he’s specific in his prayers!

A few months ago, a good young Catholic was drifting away from God. He had been growing steadily closer to God, but was in a spiritual slump and not participating at daily Mass even when it was easy for him to do so. I was sad and concerned for him. But I chose not to lose hope, and, instead of worrying, I turned to praying with faith, and offered Mass for him. And during that Mass, I saw him show up and get back on track with Jesus. God is good.

Despite witnessing so many answers to prayers, I realize that I’ve given up praying for people or prayed without believing it would happen. I know my faith must get stronger.

What is God asking you to pray for and not give up on? How is God asking us to change our prayers? Perhaps pray with more faith, trust, perseverance, and obedience?

For me, as a sign of faith, I’m going to pray for bigger things. I always pray that I become a saint, but now I’m going to pray that you all become saints! That’s right. “All things are possible for him who believes” (Mk 9:23). I’ve been here for six weeks and I’ve seen that the Saturday Confession line is long so we’re going to start Confessions at 4 p.m. rather than 4:30 p.m. (There are a lot of sinners here.) But it’s actually a good sign of life in a parish.

I’m also not going to give up on family and friends who are far from God. I’m going to pray that many people come to know Jesus through this parish. I’m going to pray that we grow in love here. So we’ll be starting RCIA on Thursday, Sept. 11 at 7 p.m. If you know anyone who’s interested in learning more about Catholicism or in becoming Catholic, please let me know.

God wants to give us more, if we have faith, meaning we pray sincerely, with trust and with obedience.